


When The Heart Guides The Hand

by beeteljuice



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: (at the start), Abuse, Abusive Relationships, Affairs, Age Difference, Alive Petra Ral, Alternate Universe - Victorian, Anal Sex, Angst, Bad Decisions, Bloodplay, Bottom Eren Yeager, Character's Name Spelled as Jaeger, Choking, Dirty Talk, Drinking, Eren Is a Little Shit, Eren Yeager Is a Tease, Eren is 16, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Forbidden Love, Infidelity, Jealous Petra Ral, Levi (Shingeki no Kyojin) is In Denial, Levi Loves Eren Yeager, Levi Wants That Yeager Booty, Levi is 27, Lies, Lust, Lust at First Sight, M/M, Married Couple, Minor Jean Kirstein/Eren Yeager, Obsessive Levi (Shingeki no Kyojin), Older Levi (Shingeki no Kyojin), Older Man/Younger Man, One-Sided Levi/Petra Ral, Pining Levi (Shingeki no Kyojin), Poetry, Poor Eren Yeager, Poor Life Choices, Possessive Levi (Shingeki no Kyojin), Recreational Drug Use, Rough Sex, Sad Ending, Slightly Abusive Relationship, Smut, Spit Kink, Top Levi (Shingeki no Kyojin), Underage Drinking, Violent Sex, Young Eren Yeager, i feel bad for petra, poets
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-23
Updated: 2018-01-09
Packaged: 2019-02-19 05:20:24
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 5
Words: 4,228
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13116900
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/beeteljuice/pseuds/beeteljuice
Summary: Young poet Eren Jaeger sends a letter to the slightly older poet Levi Ackerman attached with his poems. The following is the tale of what unfolded when Eren arrived at Ackerman's home in Paris.(Read All the Notes)





	1. The Time Has Come For Bitter Things

**Author's Note:**

> hi! this is a snk version of the real story of french poets Arthur Rimbaud and Paul Verlaine.  
> I loved the movie sm and thought i'd make it an snk fic with my boys.  
> keep in mind this is more based on the 1995 film total eclipse about rimbaud and verlaine more than actual history. i mean i have researched a lot cause i love the real story but i cant find a lot of articles about the real thing. so im not sure how accurate this is historically if u kno more pls tell me i wanna know.
> 
> (also rating may change)
> 
> enjoy i guess
> 
> (ALL COMMENTS ARE APPRECIATED i love them sm pls leave them)

Eren stood at the door, staring inside at the petite ginger sitting at a dining table, who had not yet noticed him. She was of a goodly belly and wearing a nightgown, with a small silver spoon in her hand, sipping small amounts of soup. 

He cleared his throat once.

She looked up, her wide, amber eyes staring at him.

"Oh! You must be Monsieur Jaeger! I'm Petra, Levi's wife." She spoke, he noticed how high her voice was, how womanly sounding it was.

He nodded, looking around the large kitchen. The woman stood up slowly, holding her stomach. She walked over to him, smiling softly. He held his hand out, she took it sweetly, but he shook it with vigorous force, making her whole body shake. She let go, putting her hands together, her eyes darting to Eren's unwashed hair. He scratched his filthy scalp, his brown locks shaking.

Eren nodded, looking around again

"Where is Levi Ackerman?" He asked bluntly, having noticed there was no other man around.

"He went looking for you at the station, actually." She said quietly.

"He doesn't know what I look like, does he?" Eren replied. Petra opened her mouth then closed it again.

"Perhaps you'd like a wash?" Petra asked, a maid appeared behind him, grabbing at his coat.

"No." He said, taking his coat off and handing it to the maid. The maid took it, walking away.

"I need a piss." He said, a small smirk on his face appearing when he saw Petra's startled face. She nodded, looking away.

"Well, when you are done come back down, I have prepared some soup for you."

Eren nodded, walking to find the bathroom.

Eren was a young writer, only sixteen, looking for someone to mentor him. He wanted to know all there was to know about poetry. He had tried to reach out to a different poet before, but there was no reply. Ackerman was one of the only poets Eren respected. He had sent Ackerman a letter, with some of his poems attached. To his delight, Ackerman had responded.

 _Come, dear great soul. We await you; we desire you._  Ackerman's response had read.

With that, Eren left his home in Charleville and made his way to Paris, Ackerman paying the fair, of course. At first, Eren's mother had not been so keen on Eren staying at the home of a man ten years his senior, but when she had found out he paid Eren's way, she was alright with the arrangement.

Eren walked downstairs into the kitchen, finding Petra over the same bowl of soup, having still not finished it.

 _I thought women became hungry when pregnant?_ He thought to himself, the bowl was only little, but he supposed the spoon was little too. Or maybe the woman was concerned with looking ladylike. He would never understand how the other gender thought.

Hell, how other people thought.

He slammed himself down onto the chair, across from the woman. His journey had been quite a long one, and he had not eaten anything on the way so his appetite had become increasingly large. He quickly gulped down the soup, his back hunched over the table. He was tall for his age, and lean, the chair was small, and there was minimal space for his long legs. He ate quickly, and every once in a while he'd look up to see Petra's eyes on him, wide and judging him. He'd smirk, and return to his bowl.

A pair of keys rattled in the door and footsteps could be heard walking towards the kitchen.

"He wasn't there, maybe he isn't coming." A deep voice sounded out from the doorframe.

Then Eren turned his head away from the bowl, to look to where the voice had come from.

And then teal met grey.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is short yeettt


	2. Dandy In Your Ghetto

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello another chapter  
> this chapter is lowkey filler nothing really goes on  
> it just kinda introduces levi and explains more about eren and builds their relationship a lil bit  
> ALSOO can anybody notice what the chapter titles are and where they're from comment if u can  
> all comments are appreciated ty

Levi had never seen such eyes.

They pierced him, the vibrant green never leaving his icy blue. The boy - whom he assumed was Eren - wiped his mouth with the back of his hand.

"You must be Jaeger?" Asked Levi, clearing his throat.

"Indeed I am." The boy replied, a smirk appearing on his face and his eyes not leaving Levi's. Eren then turned to Petra.

Petra! _Mon Dieu_. He thought. He had forgotten about Petra for a minute.

"Do you have any more food?" Eren asked, his neck craned to look at her.

"Yes! I was just waiting until Levi got home!" She spoke in that cheery voice she used so often. She got up, kissed Levi on the cheek and went to grab the meal. She was beautiful. Levi knew this. She was short, with a young, womanly body. His conscience told him that she was everything he desired. She was pregnant, for God's sake.

He had ignored the feelings he had for men before, hidden them. Albeit hid them well, but still hid them.

Nobody would ever know. They couldn't.

Levi sat down on the table near the boy, who was staring down at the empty bowl, and stared at his face.

Bright, green-blue eyes. Tan skin. A young face. Messy hair. Levi didn't take him for a French-man born.

"Were you born in France?" He found himself blurting out. Eren looked up at him, smiling sheepishly. Levi found himself wondering about the intentions behind his smile. The boy seemed like a huge contradiction. Innocent but not so innocent. There was a playfulness behind his smile that unsettled Levi but left a tightness in his chest. Did he know Levi was staring? Levi hoped not.

"Well, yeah, but my mum was born in Turkey and my dad was born in Germany. I'm a mutt." Eren said, stretching his arms out behind his head.

A mongrel. It explained the tan skin and dark hair and the bright eyes.

Levi’s eyes shot to the plate that had just been placed in front of him.

”Thank you, dear.” He said to his wife, she smiled at him before sitting down and eating her own meal. Eren was not so polite, however, since he belched and scratched his dirty hair throughout the whole meal. Petra continously gave Levi concerned looks, but Levi was more concerned with the colour of Eren’s eyes and the youthful twinkle that shined in them.

”How old are you?” Petra blurted out, her eyes on Eren.

”Sixteen.”

Levi swallowed.

”You said you were twenty-one in your letter.” Levi stated.

”I lied.” Eren said, a grin on his face.

“Those poems were remarkable for someone of twenty-one, but for someone of sixteen they’re unbelievable.” He said, and it was true. Eren sure had a talent for writing, though the poems were quite unorthodox.

”Will you read some of your poems?” Petra asked.

”No.” The boy replied bluntly.

”But all the poets do.” She argued.

”I’m not interested in what all the poets do.”

Levi stared at the boy, who was staring at his wife, trying to figure him out.

Eren stood up, walking towards the stairs. Levi followed him like a lost puppy in a trance, ignoring his wife's concerned looks. The boy had took it upon himself to look into every room, touch every painting and run his fingers along the wallpaper. Levi watched him, how his eyes opened with curiosity, how his face scrunched with displeasure.

"Your room is at the end." Levi said, biting his fingernail. Eren turned around to face him, and walked to the end of the corridor, to the last door on the left side. He walked inside and Levi walked in after him to see the boy had gone to the end of the room, taking his coat off the peg that the maid had placed it on and looking out the window.

"It's not much." Levi said, scratching the back of his neck.

"It's big enough." Eren said, turning to look at him with a small smile on his face. He then took turned to look out the window.

"There's a pub there! Let's go!" He shouted, turning to look at Levi with a big grin on his face. He walked up to Levi, the same grin ghosting his lips.

"Don't think I didn't see those empty bottles in your room." The younger boy laughed. Levi noticed how tall he was, he was lean too. 

"Fine, we'll go." Levi found himself saying.

"Great!" Eren ran to get his coat, putting it on.

"Your wife won't mind, will she?" Eren asked, although it was quite obvious to Levi he didn't care either way.

"No, she shouldn't."

 

* * *

 

 "Have you had this before?" Levi asked as he poured absinthe into Eren's glass.

"I know what it is." The boy replied, the scent of hashish still on his breath from when he had been entertaining his pipe earlier. Levi smirked, taking a sip from his own glass, the familiar burn stinging his throat.

"Are you going to publish your poems?" He asked, leaning back in his chair, examining the boy's face.

"Why would I want to publish them? I don't give a shit about that. It's the writing itself that counts." Eren replied, sipping a small amount of the absinthe, his face twitching, probably since the burn was unfamiliar to him.

Or was it?

Levi had no idea if this boy was as inexperienced as he looked. His writing was exquisite, and he was so young. Levi wondered what the boy had seen, what he's felt, who he's met. 

"You know your last book?" Eren said, taking Levi from his thoughts.

"Hmm?"

"Shit. Pre-marital shit." Eren said, slamming his glass on the table and leaning back in his seat.

"No, love poems. Some thought they were rather beautiful." Levi argued.

"But they're all lies." Eren said, putting his arms on the table, his brows raised and a smirk on his face.

"They weren't, I love her." Levi said, taking a big gulp of his drink.

"Love doesn't exist." Eren said, his eyes flicking to the different parts of Levi's face, then back to his eyes. Levi squinted, giving the boy a questioning look.

"Self-interest exists." Eren explained. "Lust exists. Infatuation exists. Cowardice exists. Not love."

"I think you've had too much to drink." Levi said through a small laugh. Eren laughed hard.

"No I haven't. It doesn't exist. Trust me."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> mon dieu = my god  
> also if u still cant figure out who is who then  
> eren = rimbaud  
> levi = verlaine


	3. A Pretty Pistol

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is gonna be rlly short im so sorry.  
> next chapter will be better

"Daddy won't like him." Petra's soft voice sounded out. She was laying in her bed, her hand over her large stomach, watching her husband pace up and down the room. Levi looked at her once, a soft 'tch' escaping his lips before walking to her and grabbing the headboard roughly, hovering over her.

"Well, he'll have to deal with it." Levi whispered harshly, feeling the anger rise up. Petra looked away, staring at her stomach and the small kicks that had appeared under her skin.

"For God's sake Petra, I am your husband! I shouldn't have to repeat myself!" He was yelling now.

Their arguments were frequent. Levi always seemed to put the blame onto his young wife. She wasn't the brightness, and he found himself becoming increasingly annoyed with her continuous questions but most of their arguments were about Petra's father and how he always disagreed with Levi's decisions.

"I'm sorry, Levi." Petra squeaked, a hint of fear in her eyes. Levi kissed his teeth again before turning to go downstairs.

 

* * *

 

Eren looked around the large living room. He looked at the couches, the countless knick-knacks and the paintings.

A large mirror sat on one of the walls and he walked over to it, and examined his features.

He saw the redness in the whites of his eyes from the hashish he had smoked and the small black dots that had surfaced in his hair.

He stripped himself of his too-large-for-him coat and rough waistcoat, leaving him in his undershirt and clothes on his bottom half. The shirt he wore had many holes and was extremely dirty due to the fact he had only ever washed it in the dirty lake that lived near his farm.

He thought about his mother. 'The mouth of darkness' he had named her, she was usually very serious and never enjoyed to joke around unlike him.

He thought about his sister, Mikasa. She was nine, and it seemed that she looked up to him a lot. Well, his mother had only told him about his good grades in school and not his numerous antics, even though Mikasa had figured that out on her own.

He thought about his father. He was probably drinking.

He then thought about the man upstairs, who had let him into his home with open arms and had been eyeing him ever since he got there. Eren smirked at the thought.

A pair of keys rattled in the door and Eren whipped his head around to look at it, and in walked a tall man with dark hair, his clothes neat.

"Hello." Eren said, blinking up at the man.

"Who are you?" The man asked, obviously suspicious of him.

"Eren Jaeger." He said, attempting to pat his hair into decency.

The man just sighed in response, and walked upstairs. Eren immediately shrugged it off, and went back to looking at the room, even stealing a crucifix.

 

* * *

 

"Ackerman, I've told you not to do _things_ like this without my permission!" Levi's father-in-law yelled, his arms crossed and his brows furrowed, Levi was sure Eren could hear the argument from downstairs.

"What are you talking about?" Levi said with a sigh.

"Inviting little _ruffians_ into my home!" He shouted, his face reddening with anger.

"First of all, he isn't _that_ bad. Secondly, he needed my help." Levi responded, pinching the bridge of his nose.

"Help with what? Taking all your money?" His father-in-law accused.

"No!" Levi shouted, growing extremely defensive to his father-in-law's claims that Eren was using him for the money he had.

"No." Levi said, calming down. "He's a poet, and he sent me his works and he wanted me to mentor him. Teach him." Levi said, his voice calmer. His father-in-law marched up to him, grabbing him by the shirt.

"I swear to God, Ackerman." He whispered, venom dripping in his voice, before walking to his bedroom. Levi ran a hand through his dark hair before walking downstairs, set out on finding the boy Levi himself had named the _exquisite youth._ Levi couldn't help himself, everything about the boy was amazing. His eyes. His skin. His mouth. His _mind_. Levi was sure he would explode every time he saw the boy, but he kept himself in check, and kept his calm demeanor.

 

* * *

 

 Levi walked downstairs to see the boy sitting cross-legged in the middle of his living room, holding a crucifix. Teal eyes looked up at him, blinking.

"Hello." Eren said, his eyes shining in the light of the candles around the room.

Levi bit his lip.

"What are you doing?" Levi asked, looking around the room. Many of the items and knick-knacks around the room had been destroyed, he walked over to pick up one of his father-in-law's favourites, an blue ornament in the shape of a dog.

"Looking." Eren said, swerving on his ass to face Levi, smiling widely.

"Have you written anything?" Levi asked, sitting on the couch across from him.

Eren swerved around to face him again and grinned even wider.

"Yes! You can read it if you want! But later." Eren said before tilting his head, and from the way he looked Levi could tell he was about to say something cheeky.

"You can neglect your wife even more for me." The young boy said, smirking.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> theres probs some mistakes here im lazy af lol


	4. Something Beautiful Or Something Free

Levi sat in the chair in Eren's room, his legs crossed. He watched the boy sitting on the floor, with nothing but a large blanket wrapped over his body hiding his decency, talk about his home life.

"I ran away countless times but always came back, once I even got arrested." Eren rambled on, a smile on his face. "I finally got away when you invited me to your home, though. You saved me in a way." Eren said, scratching his scalp.

"I'm glad." Levi said, taking a sip from the glass of gin he was holding.. Eren laughed, taking another puff from his hashish pipe.

"What do you think of my wife?" Levi asked, his eyes trailing down Eren's crossed legs.

"I'm not sure." Eren said, looking down before his eyes flashing up to Levi's. "What do you think of her?"

Levi let out a sigh. "She's the ideal wife. Young. Beautiful. Obedient, and she's giving me a baby." Levi shrugged, brushing some dust off his coat.

"Well, do you have any common interests?" Eren asked.

"No."

"Is she intelligent?" The boy asked again.

Levi paused for a moment, a small smirk on his lips. "No."

"Does she understand you?"

Levi let out a whole laugh then. "No."

"Then the only thing she can give you is sex." Eren smiled, sharp teeth showing.

Levi smiled softly in response, sighing again before realising something. "My father-in-law has returned now, you'll have to have dinner with us all."

Eren nodded in response, his lips pressed together. "Fun."

Levi chuckled. "I'm going out to buy some gin." He stated, fixing his coat again.

"You old drunk." Eren said, smirking. Levi looked at him, them both laughing.

As Levi walked out into the street - saying goodbye to Petra beforehand - he looked up at the window to Eren's room, only to see a naked Eren, clutching the blanket and a pile of clothes only to cover his manhood, standing on the ledge.

"Levi!" The youth shouted, laughing hard. He then threw the clothes down to the street, almost dropping the blanket that covered him, laughing even more.

Levi just shook his head and walked towards the store.

 

* * *

 

 

"So, Eren, you write poetry, correct?" Petra's father asked at the table, his eyes stuck on the way Eren ate his meal with his hands and not bothering to use the cutlery.

"Yeah." Eren said, a mouth full of food. Petra's father nodded, going back to eating.

"How come you've started whoring out your daughter this young?" Eren suddenly asked, staring at Petra's father, who's face filled with disgust. Petra audibly gasped and Levi just stared at the younger male with wide eyes.

"I beg your pardon?" Petra's father asked, dropping his cutlery.

"Well, seventeen is a little young to give your maidenhead to a man ten years your senior, don't you think?" He said again, clearing trying to bite back a smirk.

"I've never heard such filth! Do you speak to your mother this way, boy?" Petra's father screamed, having now stood up, his hand on his daughter's shoulder.

"I don't speak to my mother, she's a bit of an old cunt." Eren said, beginning to laugh. Petra's father slammed his hand on the table, his eyes filling with rage.

"I am repulsed! How dare you!" The man yelled, Eren only laughed harder in response.

"Levi, say something." Petra said softly, holding her husband's hand. Levi stayed silent, his elbow on the table and his head in his free hand.

He wanted to do something.

He wanted to stop the boy next to him.

But he couldn't stop staring at the boy's eyes, and the sheer freedom in them.

And he couldn't stop listening to his words, the carelessness he had.

And he couldn't stop thinking about his mind.

The wonder that it held behind all the filth.


	5. Prick Your Finger, It Is Done

"Petra, come, let's go to bed." The young girl's father said, grabbing her hand and leading her out of the dining room. Levi looked to the young boy that had taken it upon himself to sit on the dining table.

"You little shit." He spat, staring into the boy's eyes. "He's going to make me kick you out! Do you even think?"

"You'd follow me, wouldn't you?" Eren said, smirking, his eyes falling onto one of the knives on the counter.

"What are you talking about?" Levi said, his eyes tracing down to Eren's lips. Eren laughed, crossing one leg over the other.

"Don't think I haven't noticed." Eren spoke. Levi stepped back. "Don't think I haven't seen you looking."

"What are you on about? I've only eyes for my wife." This caused Eren to laugh harder.

"Don't pretend to be charmed by that dainty little girl." Eren stood up, walking to the opposite side of the table to where Levi was sitting. "The poems you used to write were so amazing before you tied yourself down to the chains of marriage. You used to chase beauty and you threw it away for a life of simplicity. It disgusts me." Eren spoke, a hint of playfulness on his face. Levi stood up, grabbing the knife on the counter, and pinned the younger boy on the table and held the knife against his throat.

"What do you know about marriage? Huh? You're just a petulant little fucking brat, you know that? What I would give to jam this knife in your throat!" Levi shouted, staring at the boy's wide eyes. They were not wide with fear, it seemed, but excitement and wildness.

"Do it!" Eren shouted, laughing with a big grin on his face.

So Levi did.

He sliced a small part of Eren's neck and watched as the blood welled on his throat. He looked up to Eren's eyes to see they had darkened, he saw the madness inside of them, the freedom. Eren looked at the knife, then up at Levi again. Levi pulled the knife back and dropped it on the floor and Eren sat up to sit on the table. His face was so close their noses touched and Eren wrapped his legs around Levi's waist.

"Eren, I'm-" Eren covered his mouth with his hand before he could finish.

"See? You've just lived more in two minutes with me than a year with your wife." Eren smirked, moving his hand to wipe the blood off his neck.

Then in a spurt of lust and carelessness, Levi grabbed his hair with both hands and brought the boy's lips to his. He pushed the boy down against the table again and grabbed his legs, hitching them up on his waist higher. Eren moaned into the kiss, forcing his hands into Levi's hair.

 _Mon Dieu._  Levi thought.

Eren tasted liked hashish and wine and sugar and absinthe. He would've usually thought such a combination was disgusting but the flavour of Eren's tongue was too delicious. Eren tugged slightly on Levi's hair, sending jolts of pain and pleasure throughout his body.

It felt right. It felt correct. It felt truthful. It didn't feel like the lie he felt with Petra.

He was free. Even just for a moment.

Eren pulled away, his pupils dilated and his lips red and wet. He tilted his head and smiled. Standing up, Eren grabbed Levi's face once more and kissed his cheek tenderly.

"I'm going to bed." He said breathlessly, smiling, and walking out to the guest room.

Levi was alone with his thoughts once again.

 

 

* * *

 

 

Levi couldn't take it.

He was supposed to be listening to the great poetry being read out by his friend Gunther.

He  _should_ be focusing on the valuable feedback his friends in his poetry circle gave to eachother.

But he couldn't stop thinking about the incident that had occurred the night before in the dining room.

He couldn't stop thinking about Eren's lips against his own.

He ached to feel them again.

"What do you think, Levi?" The sound of his friend - Erwin - saying his name snapped him out of his hazy, lustful thoughts.

"Oh, yeah." Levi said, nodding slightly.

"Are you okay there?" Hanji's voice sounded out. Many people who had heard of their circle had always commented negatively on how they had a member who was a woman, but they believed she was perfectly good at writing and equally as good at giving feedback.

"I'm fine." Levi snapped, rubbing circles on his temples.

"When do we get to meet that young poet you keep on speaking about." Erwin asked, a brow raised.

Levi's heart jumped, and the boy's name hadn't even been mentioned.

"Oh. Very soon. He's got a small chest cold." Levi lied. Truthfully, Eren was reluctant about meeting the group, claiming they were probably too  _bourgeoisie_.

"Poor thing! How old is he again?" Hanji questioned.

Levi cleared his throat.

"Sixteen. He's sixteen."

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

Eren laid on his small mattress, his mind dwelling on the events of the previous night. He smiled to himself, clutching the duvet.

Petra then walked in, turning away when she had noticed Eren was not clothed.

"Oh! Monsieur Jaeger! I'm so sorry! I shall come la-"

"No, stay." Eren said, sitting up and smirking.

Petra reluctantly walked in, shuffling uncomfortably.

"Monsieur Jaeger.. You must have come to understand there have been some problems lately in the household-"

"The best household I've ever been a part of! I feel very at home here." Eren exclaimed, interrupting Petra.

"-Due to your presence.. You see, your words last night during dinner were very offensive and.. not welcome here.." Petra said, fumbling on her words.

"My father is going to speak with my husband to see what shall be done about your place in this household."

"Very well then!" Eren said, laying back down.

"Good day to you, Monsieur Jaeger." And with that, she was gone.

 


End file.
